I always seem to be living my life up until some kind of limit. Either I'm brainlessly happy, horribly depressed, terrifyingly genki or deadly bored. Either my life is always in one of those states, or I only seem to remember the extremes. In any case, it would seem that I prefer the extremes over the average. Unless it's extremely average, perhaps? I can certainly take pleasure in being very depressed, or being in much physical pain. I guess my jokingly saying 'I like suffering' turns out to be true. It doesn't mean I don't like happy things, though, cause I like those too. I don't like nothings. Being in-between is what's boring. Running at my limit feels great. Running at an average speed that I could keep forever is boring. Same goes for cycling. Basically, if you can prepend the word 'epic', then I'll like it :D - Epic trips, epic photos, epic life-threatening situations. Epic malaria... That's what makes life interesting.. >_<; Seek out sensation. Why else would you bother to live?
On a slightly more practical note: I've been pondering exactly what photo equipment to bring with me for the trip. At first I got all excited and I planned to bring three main lenses and the two primes. Then I started thinking I'd want to carry less stuff for this trip. I don't think I could feel really free if I'm carrying around a heavy (and expensive!) camera and a bunch of lenses. So I considered bringing my old camera (400D) cause it's smaller and lighter and only the 18-200mm lens, but that's also quite a lot of stuff, and I'd rather bring the 50D instead. Then I thought: why not bring just a compact camera? It's not like I will miss any part of the experience with only a compact camera. I will still be able to see everything that I would see with a large heavy bulky camera. The experience would not change for me at all. It might even be better with only a compact, because I will see with my own eyes instead of through a lens. But then I remember all the people I've spoken to so far. All my friends and my family, they tell me: "take lots of cool pictures! I want to see them when you get back!". I realized why I take photos. It's not for myself after all, it's to share them with the people I know, so they can look at my experiences and enjoy it too. So I will bring all the heavy stuff, and I will take lots of pictures :D
I am leaving for Africa with a good feeling.
(Note to self: next time you have an important trip, don't eat four different kinds of curry the week before you leave!!!)