Personality death

I was going to blog today about my daily life here in Holland, and how I experienced the Holland-Japan world cup match, but then I realized that these topics are not what I want to write about at all. So, instead of daily life I am going to write about how my personality is dying ever since I came back to Holland.

Over the past few weeks I have been forced (perhaps 'given the chance' is a better phrasing) to develop my unique personality. Traveling by bicycle by myself, never hanging out with the same people for very long, you always have to present yourself anew to whomever you meet. At every encounter you get a chance to reinvent yourself. Why not introduce myself as Jim from Australia who owns a sheep farm? Well, I never went that far, but I did try to give other people a good first impression of myself by selectively emphasizing some parts of my life while leaving other parts out.

It's interesting to have a chance to meet new people, and give them an impression of yourself based on the qualities that you think are important to you. If you think that making international friends is important, then you mention that. If you think it's important that you drank a lot of beer last night, then you mention that. People will form an image of you based on what you tell them at your first encounter, and then develop that image from there. It matters a lot what you tell them first. During my trip I initially started out tentative, gauging the personality of the other person and telling him things about myself that I thought he might agree with or be similar in. Later on in the trip I got used to meeting new people and didn't really care what I said about myself anymore. At times I didn't say anything about myself, or sometimes I would just say something without thinking.

At home nobody cares what you say. They won't change their mental image of you just because you say something new. They already know you, through and through. There's no way in hell that they suddenly will think differently of you. And, vice versa, because they treat you the same way they usually do, you revert back to your old personality. Two months (four years!) of individuality, gone. I'm back at the place where time stands still and everybody is still the same as four years ago. I'm the only one who changed, and I no longer fit in. Of course it's not like that. From the point of view of other people a lot of things changed, including me. They probably think it's strange for me to not accept the current state of affairs.

This sounds a little vague, so here's a real-life example. I am staying in my parents' place, and they operate on a schedule. Every day lunch is at 12:15, dinner is at 18:00. No exception, except perhaps on weekends where the time may differ within a 30 minute margin. This wouldn't be much of a problem if there were nice places to eat around here, but this is without a doubt the countryside, and (affordable) restaurants are not very close. Besides that I actually have to worry about where to eat in Holland, because the quality of the food at the restaurants here is definitely lower than in Japan, where you can eat anywhere, no worries. Basically it's more convenient for me to stick to the eating schedule here. I can't just walk out to a convenience store in the middle of the night and buy whatever food I feel like. I could give more examples here about how I am expected to go shopping with the family on weekends, go out to meet the locals, etc etc.

I'm a random person. I like to decide what I do with my life, and I don't like to compromise for other peoples' sake. My life is my life, and I am opposed to anything and everything that stands in the way of my individual lifestyle. Right now my mind is telling me that I don't like this place. I need to get away from here. I'm afraid that if I stay here too long that I'll be able to accept this life. If I had never gone to Japan I might have lived here happily ever after, but right now this place just feels like shit. If I stay here for a long period of time then the personality that I've developed while I was in Japan will die, and I don't want that. I like the Japan-me a million times better than the Holland-me. I hate it that people here treat me like the Holland-me, and I'm losing my patience with the situation.

Posted in Thoughts

Guh

My luggage arrived yesterday! Two big boxes full of stuff that I now think I don't need. Well, most of it anyway. I did find my old computer-related stuff though, like my old harddisks. One of them is an external raid-array that I used to mirror all my important data like my photos. Unfortunately the raid case's power adapter only works on 110 volt... My dad managed via a friend to get his hands on a home-made power inverter, but right after connecting it the fuse blew and half the house was without electricity... Today he brought a proper one, and I can finally access all my data again. Well, to make a long story short, I was struggling with building a working PC the whole day. It took me until deep in the night until I finally got everything to work. Thanks to my family's selective cleaning tendencies I was able to find obscure things like old graphics cards and hard disks, but wasn't able to find the things that I really needed, like a keyboard, a VGA-DVI converter and a PCI-express power supply connector for graphics cards. I managed to solve the last issue by home-making a cable myself by the way...

I'm setting up by own place to relax, but it doesn't feel like home (yet?). I just can't get myself to accept the fact that I'll be here for several months. I want to go back to Japan! I'm still adjusting, I guess.

Also, minor update on the tax issue: it seems that most foreigners, when they leave the country, just exit the country right after quitting their job. This means that they never receive the residency tax bill, and never have a chance to pay it. I have not heard of anyone having problems coming back to Japan after not having paid their residency tax. If you are one of these persons, please let me know! I'm still wondering whether I should pay or not. 250.000 yen is a lot of money..

Tomorrow's the Netherlands versus Japan in the world cup football. This'll be interesting :D

Posted in Japan , Tech

Flatland

All wrapped up

Holland won from Denmark! I watched the match in a sports bar in Atsugi with some friends. After that we also watched Japan vs Cameroon, which was incredible. Quite a good atmosphere. When the match finished it was about 1AM, and I went to fetch my bicycle and went to the bus stop. It took me a bit more than half an hour to take apart my bicycle and put it inside the bag. I managed to fit everything inside including 3 out of 4 sidebags. The bus would arrive at 5:10AM so I sat down next to my luggage and took a rest.

I woke up at around 4AM when an old man from the bus company arrived to prepare for the arrival. He wished me a pleasant morning, and then told me to go home because I could not bring my bicycle bag into the bus. New regulations, apparently. Rather than choosing to deal with this setback rationally, I decided to fall asleep again. 30 minutes later I woke up again, and the guy told me that there might be a small chance that I could ride the bus after all. Another 10 minutes later a second guy arrived and told me it's no problem as there's plenty of luggage space. The first guy tried to convince the second guy to make me pay for a second seat because my luggage was normally not allowed on the bus, but the second guy told him to shut up and stop being an asshole (well, in my mind this is what happened. In reality the second guy was a bit more polite)

And on we go! On the bus, then waiting at the airport, checking in my luggage and paying for overweightness, then an 11-hour flight and suddenly I'm back in Flatland. I mean, Holland. I miss mountains already. I took a taxi from the airport to my friend's place in Amsterdam. All this time the reality that I was back in the country where I was born, without a way back to Japan, did not quite sink in.

The next day I woke up, my friend went to work, and I put my bicycle back together.

Re-assembly
Re-loaded

Amazingly, not a single part broke during the flight. I managed to put my bicycle back together in pretty much the state it was when I left Japan. Even better, because I waited until Holland to mount the new bicycle stand you can see under the rear sidebag.

When I was back in Japan I seriously considered the idea of cycling back home, but once back in Holland the idea just seems absurd. This is not a country of adventure, or at least it isn't to me. I just want to get home, so I took the train. Fortunately Amsterdam is not so big, and I was able to zigzag my way towards the central station without too much trouble. Cycling in Holland was a big adjustment for me, as I had to cycle on the right side of the road instead of the left side. Amsterdam's bicycle culture was interesting too: my bicycle usually stands out a lot, but in Amsterdam my bike was one of the least extravagant ones. It was also comforting to be able to park anywhere without having to worry about the police taking away your bicycle, like they do in city areas in Japan.

On the train

Sitting in the train the reality of it all finally set in. I had cycled over 3000km's from Tokyo to Kyushu, over mountains, in the rain, in the snow even. It was an incredible trip, and I finally felt the feeling of victory. I'm coming home again, after four years of Japan. Although I am unable to go back to Japan, the country I learned to love so much, for now, but I feel confident that I will return there sooner or later. In fact, the idea of returning there might prove an excellent motivation for me. Right now I'm back in Holland, and I'm a different person than I was four years ago. I'm very happy about that.

Getting off at the final destination, Groningen, I had about 15 kilometers left until I would really reach the last destination on my trip. It was a good ride. There were no hills. Of course.

Flatland
So close now..
The lake

I took a break at the lake near my home, the Zuidlaardermeer. I organized my things and prepared to surprise my parents at their home. They expected me to come home near the end of June, and they probably expect me to give them a call when I arrive at the airport. I don't think they expected me to just show up on my bicycle.

Back in smurf village

The sky is incredibly blue here. I have never seen this particular color of blue in Japan. It's intense.

HOME

I arrived home, parked my bicycle in front of the house, looked around, and didn't see anybody. I walked around the back, completely didn't see my mother sitting in a corner of the backyard, working in the garden. When I turned around and walked back I finally noticed her, and I very much enjoyed the surprised look on her face as she realized I was back home ^_^.

My father would come home from work later, and I parked my bicycle at the front of the house so he would notice it when he arrived. Again, things didn't go quite exactly as planned.. He arrived, parked his car, and came in from the back entrance! He never noticed me until he saw me sitting on the couch. Oh well, a minor failure, but the surprise in general was a great success! I'm back home now. The trip is over.

So what happens next? Good question. I have a pretty good idea of what I want to do with my life, but it's not something that I can just write down here in a couple of lines. The bottom line is, I have a goal, or a direction, that I want to work towards, but I haven't really chosen how I will do that. I'm planning to spend the next weeks deciding my course, which will affect what my life will look like after I leave this safe place again. Besides that, I have plenty of things related to Japan still left to take care of, so I definitely won't be bored.

And what will happen to this blog? Ever since I went to Japan five years ago I've been blogging - about daily life, Japan, cycling, photography, technology and my thoughts. This probably won't change. The topics might be a little different from now on, but the core theme is always the same: whatever is happening in my life, I will write it down here. A life blog. This post is published live again, no time lag. I'm up to date, and will continue to rant about my life. :D

Until next time!

Posted in Photography , Spirit of Japan , Uncategorized

Surprise!

I have a little secret to admit: I've been deceiving you all for the past few days. In truth, the blogposts I have been making for the past few days have been scheduled in advance to cover up for my surprise return to Holland! :D

Now this might be a little bit messy: at the moment that I am typing this blogpost it's 06/15, 8AM. I'm at Narita airport, waiting to check in my overweight bicycle. I have no idea if my oversized luggage will cause trouble or if everything will go smoothly, but by the time this is published (06/17 21:00) I should be back in Holland. I'm planning to surprise my parents my suddenly showing up in front of their doorstep with my bicycle, two weeks earlier than they expect me. On the 18th I will report on the results of the surprise. From then on things'll be back to normal, and I will be back in Holland, never again to return to the lifestyle I experienced in Japan for the past 4 years... T_T

Note: I did a poor job of covering up my tracks, and if you had checked my tweets, the weather report in Japan or the EXIF data on the photos I posted then you probably would have found something odd ;)

Update, two hours later: I managed to stuff all of my luggage except my backpack and one sidebag into the bicycle bag, which weighed between 26 and 30 kg o_0. They made me take the air out of the tires and had me pay 9300 yen because of the overweightness. Ouch, but acceptable. Ironically, if I had gone to Holland two months ago without the bicycle, the total weight would have been more. I've lost over 10kg. IMO if you're going to charge for weight, you might as well charge for body weight as well. Yes, I say that knowing that I would not benefit from such a deal. But it's just more logical than having to pay for overweight luggage. At least they can weigh the passengers and then decide on a price-per-kilogram for the overweight luggage afterwards, based on the total weight of the passengers. That way would make much more sense to me...

Bye bye Japan. I will miss you a lot.

Posted in Japan , Spirit of Japan

Convenience

I'm in a McDonalds hiding from the rain! I used to hate times like these when I first started my trip, but now that the end of my stay in Japan is approaching I find myself treasuring these simple times. McDonalds is convenient because I can stay here for as long as I like and I can recharge my laptop. Although some people might say that going to a McDonalds in Japan means that you're not really experiencing Japanese culture, I beg to differ. McDonalds restaurants are everywhere in Japan, and although the food is the same in any country, the Japanese McDonalds-culture is unique to this country, and probably cannot be found anywhere else. Sleeping salarymen at 2AM, chattering high school girls and middle school girls, homeless people scrounging up the money for a 100 yen hamburger, etc. etc. - all of it overlayed with a distinct Japanese 雰囲気.

For me, part of Japanese culture is their peculiar conception of convenience. There's a lot of contradictions in how this country approaches convenience. Or perhaps it's better phrased as 'Japanese people's convenient things are different from other countries'. In many ways it's the opposite of Holland. In Japan, convenience stores (conbini) are everywhere, yet trashcans are nowhere to be found. Public toilets are easy to locate, yet you have to walk for 20 minutes to find a suitable place to sit. For that matter, comfortable places to sit are hard to find! Backrests, tables, chairs, they're hard to come by once you venture into the countryside. A stay in a youth hostel generally involves a tatami room with a small low table and a pillow to sit on. No comfortable backrest for you! I had finally gotten used to sitting without a backrest when I rode in a friend's car, and the soft comfortable seat surprised me, and unexpectedly made my back hurt even more. Once you get used to a particular way of living it can be painful to change sometimes.

From my perspective, in Japan, some things that should be convenient are not, while other things that I wouldn't expect had a convenient solution, are in fact very convenient. Banks have annoyed me in particular. For example, even in a big city like Kagoshima the ATMs close on weekends. I think that's a huge WTF for any civilized country. In the Tokyo area you can use ATMs in the weekends but they will charge you more to withdraw cash. It's almost as if the system has just been thought up and hasn't been tested much, because this kind of 'bugs' are easily discovered when the system is put into production. Unfortunately it's been like this for years and doesn't like it'll change any time soon. Banks throw you another curve ball by closing their offices on weekends, meaning if you have to do anything bank-related you have to sacrifice working hours for it. You can imagine my surprise when I went to the bank last week to change my address, and was able to do it all by myself from an electronic terminal, without human intervention. Common actions are inconvenient, yet something as uncommon as an address change is extremely easy. They repeatedly betray your expectations. One instance where expectations are not betrayed is international money transfers: a fairly rare action, which is fairly cumbersome to do. As expected.

Posted in Japan

On the move again!

Yesterday I went drinking (again) with my ex-co-workers. Hanging out with them is a lot of fun, and it's very easy to get back in the rhythm of relaxing during the day and drinking in the evening and night. The situation is worsened by the world cup football because I am going to great lengths to find places to watch Holland's matches. As such I am kind of making myself stay near populated areas, so that there's always a bar or sports pub around where I can watch the match.

My bicycle is back! I picked it up from the bicycle shop today, where it's been since yesterday. I've decided to pay up and let the shop give the gears and the brakes a serious overhaul. It took about a week for the parts to arrive, but yesterday they could finally start working on my bike. When I arrived in the afternoon bikeshopguy was putting the finishing touch to the handlebar, covering it with nice soft gum tape. Pretty much everything gear-related has been replaces, except for the sprockets and chain, which were replaced two months ago before I left. The brakes have been fixed as well. I've got two brake levers for the front brakes, and two brake levers for the rear brakes, two levers close to the center and two levers at the front, in 'race' position. The race-position levers stopped functioning properly a long time ago and lost their strength completely. Now, with new brake wires installed, the brake levers are at equal strength again. Total cost: 20.000+ yen. For all the money that I spent on maintenance on this bicycle, I could easily have bought another (probably better) bicycle. I considered that during the trip: abandoning or selling my bicycle and then buying another one back in Holland, or not buying another touring bicycle again. At the time I thought that this would be my last touring trip, but after sitting still for a while I find that I can't quite abandon my precious bicycle yet. :D

New tape, new gear lever
This gear lever actually displays which gear I'm in.

Now that my bicycle's been upgraded I'm ready to go again, and my stay in Atsugi is pretty much finished. I'm heading north towards Tokyo, a sad sad place to be for a camping cyclist. But if I want to go further north then I have to pass Tokyo somehow, so I might as well do it now, in a straight line (more or less). I got a new map-book of the Tokyo area so I'm pretty sure I won't get lost. So far I've gotten by pretty well just by using my compass and the road signs, so the maps are just a bonus. A slightly heavy bonus.

New derailleur
More derailleurery

It feels like a new bicycle! Gears actually shift properly, and I don't have to coax the lever to select the right gear anymore, nor do I need to change gears three times to change up one gear. Everything is smooth and perfect. I am very happy. Also, the new tape on the handlebars feels mushy mushy and makes me smile every time I touch it.

My bicycle is now hyperdrive-equipped

The rainy season is approaching (as you can see from the photos), which is worrying me a bit. It rained a little bit today, but it was nothing serious. The weather's been great the past few weeks, and it doesn't seem like the weather'll turn (too) sour any time soon. Well, if the situation gets too dire I can always spend a couple of days in the same place and wait for the rain to pass. Back to the simple life!

Posted in Cycling , Spirit of Japan

Rainy season? I don't think so

Once again 2010 proves to be an unpredictable year in terms of weather. It's been strange for weeks when I started my trip, shifting from warm to cold many times, with a lot more rain than expected. Now that it's finally supposed to be rainy season the weather's never been better, and there's no sign of rain at all. Which is great, because I can continue my cycling for a bit longer. ^_^

Although in the past I applied the term 'cyclographer' to myself, recently there's a lot more cyclo-ing going on and a lot less graphing. As such I only took 7 photographs during this cycling trip. Once I'm in the right flow it's hard to stop at the side of the road, take out my camera and take a picture. Also, sending my DSLR home has left me a tad uninspired. I'll have to work on that.

(Japan wouldn't be Japan if there weren't at least a couple of power lines messing up the photo ;) )

Right after this short trip I went to the bicycle shop: the parts that they ordered for me finally arrived! My bicycle is at the shop right now, seems like it'll take about a day to replace the parts..

Posted in Photography , Spirit of Japan

Yabitsu Pass

I finally found time to do a full-day cycling trip while still in Atsugi. Staying in a hotel offers me the benefit of leaving my heavy luggage behind, so I can attack some roads that I otherwise would not dare to travel on. The Yabitsu pass is one such road. It goes from lake Miyagase, where I started my trip from two months ago, all the way south until Hadano, a city on the far side of OoYama, a mountain I climbed frequently while I lived here. The total distance is about 70 kilometers, which is quite doable, but it involves a climb of 700 meters, which is something I'd prefer to avoid if I was fully loaded with luggage. This time though, I want to test my strength and see if my knees have recovered, so I've decided to challenge myself a little bit.

This is where the big trip started from

The ride towards the lake was fairly uneventful, and I enjoyed the beautiful weather. Since I've driven this road a lot of times before, I can use it to see if I've improved my hillclimbing speed. Sadly, not much..

I zoomed past the lake, crossed the bridge in the middle of the lake and turned back south again at the other side, entering Route 70, also known as Yabitsu Touge. Immediately the road narrowed and all signs of civilization disappeared. I was back in nature again! Had I known that such a beautiful road was this close to Atsugi I would have come this way more often. The road roughly followed the path of a small river all the way until high up in the mountains . There were a lot of zigzags, but the uphills were not too tough, and after a while I got into a nice rhythm. After I got into the flow I started to notice the effect of not carrying luggage, and I realized that this road would be a near-death experience had I brought all my stuff. Fortunately I didn't, and I enjoyed the climb and the natural sights a lot.

Narrow roads, nice river

I reached the top in the early afternoon, which I reocgnized because I had hiked there before. My altimeter read 700+ meters and I got ready for an awesome downhill ride. Zigzaggy roads, beautiful scenery and great weather. Couldn't have been better. I'm really glad I installed the new brake blocks before this trip, because I had to use them a couple of times today in situations where the worn-out blocks would have failed. In the past I have cycled down mountains faster than this, but this downhill was in overall the longest downhill at the highest average speed. I went down so fast my ears popped :D

There was an observatory on the way down, and I stopped to take some photos. It was quite an impressive sight in reality, but the photos turned out quite hazy. I'll have to fix that later.

Slight bummer: the last bit of uphill was quite an effort, and as I was hoisting myself up the mountain, my knees started to hurt again. I don't feel anything in daily life situations, and even climbing long stairs is not an issue. Cycling is no problem except for situations like this where I really have to put a lot of force on the pedals. I really need to take it easy for a couple more days..

So I say, but after returning to the flat roads my knees felt fine again, and since it was still quite early I cycled a bit farther south and ended up at the seaside.

Ocean lookout
rvVision(tm)

I hung around there for a while and then cycled back to Atsugi, just in time to catch some sun rays on my former working place.

My previous working place

Pretty much everyone I know doesn't really like to see their working place's building in their free time, but I don't really mind. Even when I was employed, it was always interesting to see the lights on each floor go out every night at a different time.

What to do? Being back in the city without a clear goal kind of sucks! I want to go back to Kyushu again...

Posted in Spirit of Japan

An unfortunate surprise

Am I never free of Atsugi?!? It seems that the longer I stay here, the more things I need to do. Can't wait to be back on my bicycle again..

I finally organized my heavy luggage, threw away a lot of old clothes and went to the post office to send my stuff back to Holland. Note for people in similar situations: if you send by SAL it takes 2-3 weeks (but probably less) and is fairly cheap, but EMS takes one week and is more expensive. Here's the nag: SAL only accepts luggage up two 20kg, whereas EMS accepts up to 30kg for one piece of luggage. If you have a suitcase heavier than 20kg you're stuck with the expensive option. Fortunately my suitcase was exactly 21kg, and after removing a heavy coat I was able to send it by SAL for 10.000 yen less. That's nice savings!

Feeling happy about saving some money I skipped and whistled towards the city hall to ask if there was anything else to finish up. As usual, I have done no research on this topic whatsoever, and I kind of forgot to let the city know that I hadn't been living in Atsugi for the past two months. I explained my situation to a friendly person there, who told me there was nothing for me to do, just at the moment of leaving the country to mention at the immigration at the airport that I won't be coming back. Fairly easy, right? Then the nice friendly person told me to go to the second floor and ask at the tax counter if there was anything else for me to finalize. The tax counter was a very friendly pretty lady, who kindly presented me with a smile and a request to pay two hundred fifty thousand yen.

Uh, what? Did I miss something here? Here I thought I was being nice and all, formally finalizing my stay in Japan by deregistering myself from the city hall, and they present me with a bill of 250.000 yen (~2000 euro btw)? That's not very nice. When I asked about the how and why, the nice happy lady turned evil and started spouting many long and complicated Japanese words that I didn't at all understand. Finally I managed to get the gist of it, and it seems that usually the company pays the tax, but since I quit my job now I have to pay it myself. And not just the tax since I quit my job, all the tax from this year and last year as well. Argh. Feeling doubtful about paying such a large amount of money I asked an acquaintance to confirm it, but haven't received a reply yet. I'm going to gather a bit more information before settling this..

Right now I'm wishing that my Japanese skill was higher. Then I would be able to read Japanese websites much faster, and I would be able to read the pamphlets that I got from the city hall about taxes. With my current skill I'm just lacking information and running into surprises like this is not helping my morale a lot. I'm guessing it'll take at least 2 more years before I'm able to read and understand tax-related legalese in kanji, though...

Posted in Japan , Spirit of Japan

Super Camping Car!

I was feeling bored in my hotel room when I suddenly got a call from my buddy Fumi, who I traveled with in Kyushu and Yakushima. He was back in Kanagawa prefecture already, together with Hou, the Taiwanese guy who was part of our hiking troupe at Yakushima. A big surprise, because both of them were planning to stay at Yakushima for a long time, yet they're back already. So what prompted this occasion? I went to meet them to find out.

And found out I did! It seems that Fumi and Hou traveled back to Kanagawa with Hou's home-made camping car (as it called in Japanese-ified English). What took me six weeks they did in two days, and with a lot more comfort. As you can see from the picture, Hou's camping car is basically a truck with a home/cabin on top. The cabin itself can be forklifted off and put somewhere else, so Hou can still use the truck to do his job while parking his mobile home somewhere nearby his current working place. His prototype has some rough edges, but the idea is extremely practical.

Hou and his brainchild
The kitchen area

Since it's basically a truck, the inside is huge! Nothing is missing here: there's gas, water, electricity (several huge batteries powered by the truck's engine, with an option of adding solar panels on the roof), a shower, a kitchen area, a table etc. etc. It resembles a house more than a camper van. There's room underneath for four(!) foldable bicycles. Being used to low ceilings in Japan, I was very pleased to know that I could easily stand inside the camper without hitting my head.

Hou took us out for a spin in his camping car, and we went to the riverside to relax for a bit. Cold beer in the fridge, a table and some chairs, and plenty of snacks. Certainly quite different from traveling by bicycle! It was here that Hou revealed his plan: he plans to start producing and selling these camping cars in Japan. He's put a lot of thought into it, and after listening to his explanation it certainly seems like a good idea. Hou's got it all thought out, so if you happen to live in Japan and are interested in one of these babies, drop a comment here and I will let him know :D

Posted in Japan , Travel | Tagged , ,